Friday, 18 June 2010
Nope. Just miss.
"Wild Target" is this year's "Three and Out", it's "Confetti" for 2010. Don't remember those films? Exactly. In years to come, "Wild Target" will be little more than a blip on the CVs of some talented performers, a late night curio that'll make you go "What're THEY doing in THIS?".
The film is a remake of a French movie which deals with the familiar story of a Hitman developing a conscience. The man doing the hitting is Bill Nighy - delivering a performance which somehow manages to feel like a caricature of a Bill Nighy performance - and the hittee is played by Emily Blunt - foregoing her usual charismatic presence for a character who never takes her foot off the pedal marked "annoying". Nighy's assassin is hired to kill Blunt's art-thief, but changes his mind and ends up protecting her instead. Oh, and Rod from Harry Potter tags along for no particular reason n'all.
A sluggish and obvious caper-flick, an inert chase-movie and an unfunny comedy (not offensively unfunny, just... not funny) featuring directionless plotting and aimless characterisation, particularly for Nighy's Victor Maynard and his relationships with his reluctant entourage. You can't help but laugh when you've been watching two people bug the shit out of each other for the best part of an hour, only to suddenly proclaim that they've enjoyed the time they've spent together for no other reason than they've reached the point in the plot where they have to start forming a bond in spite of their differences.
Blunt - even saddled with a self-absorbed uber-irritant of a character - still manages to intermittently light up the screen, Nighy - even on some sort of bizarro autopilot - is still watchable, and Rupert Grint plays Rod from Harry Potter. With a beard. Martin Freeman shows up as a rival hitman and "reacts" to people saying stupid stuff, like Tim-from-The Office in a trenchcoat. It's a sad state of affairs when the funniest thing in your comedy film is the fact that a capable comedic performer such as Freeman has a set of hilariously buffed up and oversized gnashers, which he displays with an array of toothy grins. "MARTIN FREEMAN'S GOT STUPID TEETH! HA!" Yeah, what else you got?
If you haven't heard of this film before now, I wouldn't be surprised. It seems to be trying to sneak past audiences like a house-guest who shit the bed: Get out before they see what a mess you made. If you have heard about it; cherish this moment. You're probably never going to hear of it again.